March 31

This blog was intended to be written on March 31, but due to Ryan and I getting into a car accident, my day didn’t go as planned. As the saying goes, better late than never! Truth be told, the story could be told on any given day. However, March 31 holds a special significance, which is why I was holding out for that specific date…

March 31 marked my dad’s birthday. Along with celebrating another great year of life, we were celebrating even more of a milestone. March 31 marked 3 years ago that my dad woke up, his body overtaken with paralysis.

It was one of the worst days of my life, if not the worst thus far. Here is the condensed story as told on my Facebook page the week it all unfolded: “My dad got into a motorcycle accident on Good Friday, but his injuries were not life threatening. He broke several ribs, his collar bone, and had a punctured lung. He had an epidural towards the top of his back for pain. There were complications with the epidural. He had what they are calling an epidural abscess that caused staph infection on his spine from C4/C5 all the way down to T10. He woke up Monday morning paralyzed from the infection. VERY hard to believe and take in. They did a Laminectomy operation and removed 14 inches of Lamina (vertebrae) from his back, which cleared the infection. He is in critical condition in Neuro ICU at Gwinnett Medical and will be transferred tomorrow morning (Thurs) to the Shepherd Center, which is the spinal hospital.  At this point, he is considered quadriplegic. They are not sure how much of his motor skills will be recovered. He has shown great improvement in his arms, but not so much in his legs. They are not sure if he will ever walk again, but I have lots of faith and hope that he will. He is on a ventilator, but they are pretty certain that he will breathe again on his own sometime in the next week or so.”

That was written three years ago. Today, I read this and remember the pain and the hurt to hear that my dad was paralyzed. I remember the fear of not knowing what was to come. The fear of not knowing what my dad’s life would be like, and how it would impact our family. The feeling of helplessness and hopelessness. Although there are so many painful memories associated with that passage, I can also read this and smile. I read this and think of how far he has come since March 31, 2008. I think of all the obstacles he has overcome to get where he is today, and I can’t help but smile, while my eyes are clouded with tears of joy.

Let me continue this story that I started to write three years ago…

My dad spent 68 days at Shepherd Center. During his time there, my dad worked very hard to recover some of his mobility. At one point during his stay at Shepherd, he was given the opportunity to try a “push” wheelchair; from that day forward, he’s never gone back to using a power chair. Since his release from Shepherd, he’s continued to get stronger and gain more mobility. Not quite two years into his recovery, he passed a driving test, and now drives a wheelchair accessible van using hand controls. The freedom to leave the house at his convenience has made all the difference in the world. Since driving, there aren’t many days that he hasn’t been out doing something. Every day that he is able, my dad goes to the park to push a couple miles, always setting goals and timing himself. If the weather prohibits him from exercising outdoors, he’ll go to Shepherd Center where he is a member of their gym, or go to a local mall to push indoors. He never lets anything hold him back. He’s adjusted to his life so well, and with the best attitude…it just blows me away. His positive attitude and Faith in God are the two things that have really pulled him through. During his stay at Shepherd, amidst the long days of therapy and hard work, my dad found time to be a huge inspiration to all the other patients. I was told on numerous occasions by family members of other patients that my dad had the best attitude, and that he was an inspiration. To this day, he continues to be an inspiration to everyone he encounters, touching their lives in a way that few others can. He volunteers as a mentor to a middle school aged boy who lacks a father figure in his life. He is the leader of his Brotherhood group at church. He volunteers at Shepherd Center on a weekly basis…the list goes on- he never really stops.

I think about where he is today, and reflect on the journey that’s brought him here. I don’t know any way to say it other than I am so proud of him. My whole life I’ve heard my dad tell me he’s proud of me. From school, to the soccer field, to my career, my dad has always let me know what my accomplishments mean to him. Do you have any idea what it’s like to be able to tell my dad how proud I am of him? It is the most incredible feeling in the world, one that I could never explain. I am proud to be his daughter. I am proud to have such an incredible man to look up to in my life I am proud to call him my father, and I am lucky that in my father, I have a hero.  

Happy Birthday, dad! Looking forward to another year of great accomplishments and strides toward your recovery. I love you.